When you’re a true leader capable of making and sticking to decisions, you’re going to hear a lot of people call you crazy. No matter how practical or exciting your ideas might be to you, there will always be people who want to provide input, change your mind, or tell you that you’re wrong.
It’s your choice whether you listen to them. One thing is certain, though: True leaders don’t have any concern for the opinions of naysayers and detractors. They’re only concerned with taking the right course of action.
Breaking Away from It All
Twenty years ago, I was immersed in corporate life in Washington, D.C. I was a manager at a telecom company that employed 80,000 people and enjoyed a lot of success. It also had a lot of processes, protocols, and politics.
I was earning good money, driving a BMW, attending graduate school at Johns Hopkins University, and working on major accounts. If things continued along that path, I would retire in 30 years with a nice pension.
Six years after joining the company, disillusionment began to creep in. All of the 15-hour days left me feeling like a robot, and my sales quota began to dominate my thinking. There was no room in my life for creativity or imagination.
I began to question whether I was interested in telecom at all. I was in my twenties and already had all the outer signs of success, but something was missing on the inside. Fantasies of burning my suits and running away to the mountains, where I could work and meditate, began to take shape.
Then, I did it.
I quit my job, dropped out of school, traded the BMW for a used pickup truck, sold everything I owned, and headed for Boulder, Colo.
Everyone thought I was out of my mind, and they weren’t afraid to let me know it. My friends thought I’d lost it, my parents were furious, and my colleagues were certain that I’d had some kind of meltdown. They all tried to talk me out of it or push me to find some middle ground that wasn’t so drastic. Some of their arguments made sense, and there were even times when I was tempted to give in and listen. But in the end, I knew that I had to ignore all of the criticism and do what was right for me.
Upon arriving in Boulder, I took six months off to rest, bike, meditate, and hike through the mountains. Once I felt refreshed, I joined my first tech startup, and — just like that — I had found my calling. Two decades have passed, and I’m still in Boulder, living a life filled with passion for my work, my family, and my town. Life is 10 times better than it was in D.C., and I’m grateful that I had the strength and integrity to stay true to my opinion and follow my values.
Ignore the Naysayers: Their Real Concern Isn’t for You
True leaders will hear a lot of talk from naysayers, as was the case in my situation. They ask questions that might sound supportive or protective, but there’s always an underlying sense of defeatism. You might hear things such as: Do you really know what you’re doing? Do you really have enough experience to do that? Shouldn’t you play it safe? But what you’re really being asked is: Who are you to expect that you can achieve what others can’t?
Beware of this sort of talk because — deep down — these people, while sincere and innocent, may unconsciously be looking to validate their own need to play it safe. When you take on the impossible, succeed, and prove that anything is possible, you terrify the people who live on security and predictability.
Know When to Have Open Ears
When you’re a leader, you can’t just shut out the world, of course. There are people you should listen to.
First of all, you have to consider your customers. While you can’t please them all, remember that they are the reason your company exists. Take their feedback into account through every stage of your company’s growth. The customers who are the hardest to please will provide the most feedback, and if you can satisfy them, the rest of your customers will probably be happy, too.
You should also listen to people who have similar values and have achieved something comparable to what you’re trying to do. The best advice comes from people who have faced the same challenges and overcome them using values that match up with your own. How you handle a challenge is just as important as the result.
Knowing How to Keep It Real
It can be difficult to know whether you’re sticking to an approach because you’re convinced it’s the right thing to do or because you think it will gain someone else’s approval. So ask yourself: Will this take me one step closer to my dream, or will it just raise me in the eyes of another?
You can still give someone’s advice genuine consideration and choose not to act on it.
That’s not being indifferent — that’s being a leader.
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